View From the Soapbox

**WARNING** this post contains some raw thoughts and observations. It is intended to provoke a reaction. It is not my intention to offend. I do suspect that my thoughts may anger some people, and I am ok with that. I wish to get people to think about things that they might normally not consider. It is my intention to start a dialogue. Please respond thoughtly. Thankyou

I have been thinking a lot about worship recently. When I first came to VCC,as a musician, one of the things that drew me there was the worship. It was different from anything that I have ever experienced before. It was loud, it was modern, and the congregation was really into it. I was really moved by it. I would say that most of the time I still appreciate the worship there. I also have become an active participant in the worship in our small group. I have really begun to appreciate the small group worship much more that the large coporate worship. The worship in our small group is much more simple, very stripped down...just a couple of guitars and a drum. The large corporate worship seems more like a rock concert where they just happen to be playing christian music.

Now there is nothing wrong with rock concerts. I would say that I am a somewhat regular attender of this type of event. That being said these are the concerns that I have. Why does the audience clap at the end of each song. Who are we applauding? are we clapping on behalf of God? Are we clapping because the guitar player just ripped a really good solo? Are we clapping because our "favorite worship band" just played our favorite worship song? I am not saying that clapping is inappropriate..I just wonder if those who are clapping know why they are.

Something I would like to ask those of us who are musicians. At what point does our "performance" become less about God and more about us. I understand there there is a drive to perform....there is a desire to provide good music for others to worship to. One of the problems that I see is that during worship it is often hard to concentrate on actually worshiping because of concentrating on the performance.

Ok concern three....Something that bothers or concerns me. The occasional "pressure" from the stage to "spontaniously" raise my hands or display how much I am into the worship. Of course there are numerous people who are already "spontaniously" displaying how spiritual they are by dancing or jumping up and down. I don't ever feel compelled to do this...am I wrong? I have commented on this before to people... some have said that was ok and just worship as you wish....and this is ok... but others have told me "thats ok eventually you'll get there". What if I don't want to "get there". Agian at what point does this become more about us wanting to display how spiritual we are than it is about reacting to the prompting of the spirit. What if people are just raising thier hands because everyone else is. I am not saying that everyone who does this is faking it or showing off. I have several really good friends who outwardly react to worship and I know for a fact that this is sincere....and I really appreciate that. I don't know if there are any answers to my questions. This is just something that conerns me.

In the grand scheme of things I don't that this has any significance. Agian if I have upset anyone I am sorry....This is just how I feel